Lets add to my last one

How do you make a day like this even better....well lets just say, I was walking in the other room to call my husband because one of our friends kids had not been picked up from school and they couldnt find the parents and I tripped, my foot buckled and I fell face 1st on the floor. So now I am laying here unable to put any weight on my foot and waiting until my mom or Adam get here to take me to the hospital....I just pray that the kids stay asleep until then

When it rains, it pours

So today started off with Julie saying that she didn't feel good, but she has had a cough and a cold for about 2 weeks so I gave her some meds and sent her off to school only to have to pick her up early from school with a fever and a headache and saying that she feels really really sick. Then Kaitlyn has been crying for the last hour saying that her butt hurts since she has been so constipated that she has hemorrhoids on her bottom and still trying to poop. The doctor today gave us some medicine to start giving her which should help in about a week. She also looks like she is getting what Julie has so I think that it is just the start of what is to come. Also I discovered that she has ringworm on her leg...oh joy!! I think I am going to head to the Gym when Adam gets home tonight....LOL

What I wish people would understand

When I was diagnosed with Lupus about a year ago, I had no idea what path I was going to go down or how I would feel from day to day. I felt like I had a death sentence handed to me and I was not going to be able to watch my kids grow up. I know now that there are things that I can do to help myself and my disease. Also I know that the chance of me dying from Lupus is slim. The one thing that I wish people would understand is the symptoms that come with it. Looking back, I cant blame people because before I was diagnosed I was blind to what people are going through too. I always thought that it could not be that bad. I had a boss that had fibromyalgia and would have extreme fatigue to the point that she had to quit her job as a successful veterinarian to stay home and even then her husband had to do all of the domestic chores and feed the kids when he got home from a 12 hr day of work. I admit, I never understood and I guess until you live it, you can't. I just thought she was lazy and using it as an excuse. Boy am I so sorry. Along with Lupus comes chronic fatigue.....no one, not even my husband understands the way that I feel. Because of this I get pissed and defensive when someone complains that my house isn't clean, or I didn't get to something I said I would, or I wont go to the gym. It hurts. You think that I like feeling like this. Like I am inadequate, a horrible wife and mother and all while trying to fake it on the outside so no one will notice what it is really like for me. More days then not, I fight to stay awake while I am driving because I get so tired. I pray to god that me and my kids will get home safe. I pass up playing with my kids to lay on my bed and then am full of guilt for everything that I have missed and how they are missing out on their mom. There is no true way to explain what it is like being this tired unless you have lived it. I guess you could maybe say it is the kind of tired when you have a newborn, only it goes on forever and you never get caught up. I still don't think that quite is enough though. I would love to get help at home, like an organizer or cleaning person or something, but that costs money that we cant afford so I look around at all that has to be done and get even more overwhelmed. I am not writing this for pity, I am just writing this so that maybe when someone is cranky or rude or grumpy, maybe they are having a bad day or living with a condition that no one but them knows about. Now don't get me wrong, I have good days too...but I just wish people would understand how most days are.....

The spirit of Christmas

This is my favorite time of year. Ever since I was a kid, I loved Christmas and I still do. Now, I can also enjoy it through my kids eyes. From picking out and decorating the tree, putting decorations and lights in the yard and on the house and then tonight we tried Gingerbread houses. They had a blast and it is so fun to start new traditions with my famliy.

My husband is going to glue shoes on my foot

Okay so Adam wants me to wear shoes 24 hours a day...the thing is that I hate shoes.....I hate having them on and I would much rather be barefoot. Lets go back about 3 months ago. I was walking into the garage and ran into a metal dog crate with my toe...lets just say that my pinkie toe went one way and the rest of my foot went the other...so since it was a little one and there is not much they can do about it, I buddy taped it to the other toe which is what they say to do...well after 6 weeks, it still was not better so I went to urgent care where they said it was broken and just taking a long time to heal(no they did not take an x-ray like I wanted them to.) Well 2 weeks ago it was still hurting when I was walking...now it had been 3 months and my doctor sent me for an x ray and said that I had a poorly healed toe fracture, nothing much left to do except keep it taped for a month but it may hurt forever...great. Fast forward to Thanksgiving....I was trying to pull the turkey off the counter when I knocked the food shears off into my big toe.....well then I looked down and saw the blood seeping through my sock and it felt like I broke it....just what I needed. Well Dr Julie brought me a band aid and Adam applied pressure even though it wasn't that big of a hole...just hurt like h..l. Just what I needed, I already had one toe on the other foot taped up. So it kept me up at night for 2 nights and then it only hurt when I bent it towards my foot or touched it. This morning I woke up and my toe was swollen at least 2 times the normal size so I headed back to my doctors...she asked if I cleaned it when it happened and I laughed and said I am a mom and I needed to get the turkey on, plus it was a small injury and it went through my sock so I wasn't worried about it...well it turns out she doesn't think it is broken, but the point of the scissors lacerated my medial tendon in my toe and has since started to get infected and that along with the swelling from the tendon has caused a lot of swelling in my toe....so I am now on Antibiotics and if it gets worse in the next 3 days then I need to go back and maybe have it drained....for now I am to take my meds, some Motrin and rest and elevate it as much as possible.....haha...with a 2 and 4 yr old...good luck.

As I give thanks.....

On the eve of Thanksgiving, it is a day to think about all of the things I have to give thanks for. I am very blessed in my life.

I give thanks for my husband who is above all the best father and husband in the world.
I give thanks that I have 2 beautiful healthy daughters
I give thanks for the beautiful home that I am fortunate enough to live in
I give thanks for the food that we have to nourish us
I give thanks for my mother who is my best friend, confidant, and biggest fan
I give thank for dear friends
I give thanks that even during tough times, my business remains strong

Now the only thing is, how do you teach a 4 yr old....Julie said yesterday to me that she only gives thanks for one thing..."SANTA"

For the love of 4 yr olds.....

Okay well all I can say is that I am so tired of cleaning balls......

Okay get your mind out of the gutter. I mean little tiny bead balls that they stuff things with....Julie and her friend broke open this huge 4 ft dolphin and all the balls spilled out and then Julie thought it would be funny to make it look like it was snowing all over her room. Well about 2 hrs after I started to vacuum I think they were all gone. Then I get home last night and my husband tells me to come into Julie's room. While I was gone, the kids got a pair of scissors and Kaitlyn decided to cut up a neck pillow that had even littler balls in it, the went everywhere and stuck to everything....Julie was hiding under her covers and was quick to point out that Kaitlyn did it and when I asked Kaitlyn if she made the mess, she proudly said YES!!
So this morning I was at Gymnastics with Kaitlyn and I kept looking at her because her hair looked different. I couldn't quite place it, then it hit me...her bangs had been cut....it looked like she just had a horrible bang trim....and I asked her if she got her hair cut and she told me "Yes, Julie did it!"